Author Archives: Yi

Weeping Violins


With a heavy heart I walk
People think I’m crazy because I talk
To myself about false hopes and regrets
A heart too broken never forgets

An old man plays his erhu
How ruthless of him to remind me of you
And make me cry like weeping violins
As I try to walk away from might’ve-beens
From memories and from your echo
But they follow me wherever I go

A young boy plays with his kite
How naïve of me to think that it might
Be a sign that it’s not time to let go
A heart too broken refuses to know
How to weigh the intangible and empty
Too broken to embrace reality

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Sinking Ships


I know I’ve reached
the end of my trail
I choose to lose
and I choose to fail
Life is a game
that I’ll never win
Some sailors just
don’t know how to swim

Telling myself
what this is about
Checking myself
for last-minute doubt
I have secrets
to take to the grave
Some sinking ships
can never be saved

Incandescent (original)


Memories melting on my wall
Illusions begging for attention
Here in my veins they long to crawl
To feed my broken soul’s addiction

Self-righteous truth claiming to be
The antidote to my poison
Taunting my imagination
And walking on the shattered mirrors
That reflect the only light
Here inside my mind tonight

The world sinks its teeth in my skin
Reality scratches on my door
When the ruthless night closes in
The child in me bleeds on the cold floor

Self-righteous truth claiming to be
The antidote to my poison
Taunting my imagination
And walking on the shattered mirrors
That reflect the only light
Here inside my mind tonight

Web


Yellow candles shedding viscous tears
Shedding off my adolescent fears
Making the shadows of my fingers
Dance against these desolate corners

Little lights tickling my eyes
Reminding me of effervescent years
Making me romanticize
That stars are still within my reach like tears

Stuck in a moment, lost in a daydream
Outside, things are never what they seem
Caught in a web of thoughts on the ceiling
Trapped in a fantasy worth living

Sex object


Why am I dragging this on? Why are you dragging this on? How many times have we said “it’s over” to each other? Why am I still talking to you? Yes, I stay in love with you but I am fully aware that what you feel for me is probably obsession. How I wish I were wrong. Prove me wrong.

I need love. I want love. I want you to hold my hand and walk with me in the streets of Paris. I want to know you. I want you to know me. I want you to see me as I am and not as a sex object. I am more than just a piece of flesh for you to devour when you feel like.

Moving on


Here I am, recognizing the need to move on. Again. For the nth time. And voilà the same questions again :

What am I moving on from? Am I moving on from my love for him or from him? Am I moving on from how I used to be when I was loving him? Or from the feeling that I didn’t get the love and respect that I thought I had deserved?

Will I ever move on from his light? I see flashes of him kissing me right there on the corner of the train. How am I ever gonna take the subway without seeing flashes of him? Reviewing his kisses makes me forget that I have to move on. My mind is such a puddle of mud right now filled with broken glasses. What do I do when he tries to reconnect again just like the way he has done so many times before? Would I finally get tired of jumping in the puddle?